howdy, 101am now.
haven't been blogging. I don't have time dude...
ive got funny pics funny video but i havent uploaded it, some other day i guess. :D

How's life for secondary fours?
People complain it's taxing, stressful, draining the life out of them.. and blah.
Well, some are probably just gonna ride it through without stress and all. I dont' know.
In contrary, sec 4 is the best year ever for me. Not because I'm leaving the school like so quickly, but because it's really the year that allows me to foresee and set goals to achieve.

Honestly, for the past 3 years.. I've been saying how i wanna study hard work hard do well. That's pure bullshit.
When I compare to how I focus in class now to the past, I can confidently say that i am serious about school, it's no joke.
Not a single day is there where the word O levels is out of my head.
Well, I daren't comment on anything about my aims and all until I have proven I've done it.
It's like I DO care about my face.. i dont wanna brag about i so wanna get A1 for this that this that and in the end score some shitty results.
Afterall, talk is cheap.

This is the year which spells e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g.
Honey moon years are over. I don't like hanging around after school, I don't see a point of chatting in class, turning off in class, dozing off..(in phy lessons) or even using the computer and watching tv at home.
I do care about my studies, I do care about my ambitions, I do care about what I want in future.

Afternoon remedials are starting next week, no objections. A few grunts sometimes but it's not that bad(8.
I enjoy school now because there's an aim I know I want to achieve, I'm not totally confident of succeeding but I am going to put in effort( and i better do faggot!!!!!!!).
I'd be depressed, crestfallen and shattered if I screw up my O levels. TOUCH WOOD

ok so everyone taking Os should better buck up this year, you'd only be letting yourself down if you don't.
I wanna be proud of my results, I want to be proud of myself. I don't want to shun away from life.
So whatever it is, O levels are hell important!!!
4 years time and it's about adulthood, it's going to be time to think about career and carving the path of your own life.
Well well, just gotta keep myself spiritually uplifted for this long tedious year ahead!

I'm going to miss DE, probably won't be seeing them.. until God knows when. Sigh
I look forward to every friday not because it's the day before weekends but because there's dance ^.^
We're doing Tik Tok and it's fantabulous!! <33333
Then there's 3 more exciting saturdays to look forward to, and everything ends.
3 more saturdays for me.. and then i'll forget about you, forget!!! and kiss goodbye!

BUT I'm like mad sad since I won't be seeing those crazy girls after that..
Hopefully it's not going to be just like that.
I don't wanna be deprived of life because of O levels.

Today night went to eat with limin and kexin.. had espresso mocha and hazelnut choc cake etc!
Sinful treats, the happiness of life lies in eating.. ha ha ha!
And this reminds me of a date that's never been fulfilled.. it kind of sucks, esp when people just vanish.
Blame it on my stupidity. Blame it on my foolishness. Blame it on my passion. Then Blame it on my feelings.

How can you???? we're not doing drama shows, but it's happening like it's on tv
i dont expect anything anymore but i cant move on till you say goodbye.......
im not waiting.. but im not objecting to your appearance.
lastly, i really dislike you.

i dont wanna be involved in anything this year... no no no nothing.

At this point, my heart aches.
There's nothing to be feeling pain for, but it just comes at times.
The way I fail, in any matter, is not a good feeling.
The way I lose, is humiliating.
The way I try, is hopelessly pretense.
The way I give up, would be insulting.

----

Oh well, school has been entertaining because of our crippled friend claudia.
One word: Spastic.

going shopping next week!!! Yess!
I must very honestly admit I do have a lot of clothings, but I just don't wear them?!?!
I get bored staring at them, and they start to look unappealing...
point proven: I must earn big $$ to feed my insatiable lust for fashion.

Ok. I've got big things to do this year.
And please slap me upside down if i prove to be a failure. Because thou shall never admit to defeat!
I'm continuing higher chinese as i believe it's gonna help me next time, next year.
Besides, I do not quit, because I am not a quitter!!! :) *applause*

Can't wait for next fri sat and sun!
guess that's about it, hope this post makes some sense.
I really suck at blogging =.-

goooooooodnight and may the world be blessed tomorrow!

damn sad can't celebrate my birthday tomorrow.

hope i dont fail O lvl hmt.

no time to blog nowadays... alot of work in school

Bye

Good day earthlings, :)
0148am now, and I find myself sinking into this deep sea of thoughts.. which i do most of the time(when im free and my mind starts to wander..).
So, this would be a proper post. I hope? -Whatever is the definition of a proper post anyway-

First of all, let's sum up this one whacky year..
Honestly, this has been a way crazy year, dramatic would be an understatement. Been through the most, grown up the most.
Rocky year, but God's just absolutely amazing to magically synchronize everything to fall in place.
Felt like I had a precarious ride to hell, didn't kill me and I got up back to where I belonged. Just crazy.

Well I gotta mention, friends are destined to be important. What's life without friends? True friends, at least to say.
It's nice to know which genuine friends you have around you, and those who aren't.
It's not about who treated you best, but who never left you.
And then again, to have such friends is a gift and I really learn to appreciate that fact.
We tend to remember the bad things and overlook the good, now I always make a point to see the good things about that someone and write off the bad. Afterall, it's not like we're perfect.
So in a nutshell, I've got some pretty awesome friends and I love them(8

Next, there are always hypocritical people we meet in life. Well, we come across them time to time.
No, i dont like them but not all the time.
See, they are nice sometimes but they just do shit frequently, which is pure annoying.
Don't tell me you are not like that, have you never been nice to someone and the next moment talk crap about them?
If you say no, you are a bad liar.

I am human and I do that occasionally. However, I believe in treating everyone sincerely as long as they reciprocate.
Bottom line is, don't get on my nerves. You don't want me pissed.
Sometimes, you just got to learn to trust people. Stop thinking that they are blablahblah based on impression and then you have this barrel against them. And look, you'll never ever know how they really are.
The world's just cold in your eyes. Because you only see things the way you want to.

Next up... studies.
Everything is downhill. DOWNHILL.
I hate the fact that I don't revise. I used to be swiftly on task with holiday hw(pri sch) but not anymore :(
Nothing is up to expectations other than language, probably because you don't have to study for english and chinese.
Wait, I'm not too happy about chi actually. AND, we're getting chi O lvl results next year.. which sucks because I'm probably going to retake normal chi to aim for A1. I am ashamed as I have horribly failed myself in the oral examination which amounts to 40% of the total marks.
Hence, I am convinced I would not be able to score an A1, unless some miracle happens.

I hate math. Fuck whoever who created logarithm, modulus etc. (Apparently these are the only 2 terms I can remember at the moment.) Okay that's besides the point.
So yeah, what the fuckkk is up with A math and E math??
Whatever is the difference between the two anyway?!!!!???!? I can't even differentiate if the topics are A or E math.
Forcing students to take math is ridiculous. Hey i know my basics, and I swear that's enough for my whole life because I am NOT going to do anything in future that asks me to solve log questions, use some stupid graphic calculator like screw yOU??!?!

I think humans are really smart in an absolutely moronic way.Thanks to our amazing brain, humans are able to create many complex concepts like insane mathematic quesitons, to burden us humans to solve. Like yay, you such a genius to think of this! And heck, your smart alec-ness happens to be bothering me and the millions out there who probably hate school thanks to YOU who invented math :)
If you have such a gifted brain, please use it for a better cause like creating a new ozone layer to save the earth and not creating some stupid math ideology to kill our brain cells.
I still don't get what the fack do you learn trigonometry for?!?!

So where was I coming from?.. oh yes studies.
My A math and E math SUCKS. What if I mess up my O lvls?!?? haiz my life is over boo.
At least I find science meaningful, you can apply it to your daily life.
And it's all about things we come across, yada yada.
I hope to do good in bio, it's my only hope...... T_T my physic and chem is shit. Physic teacher is a scam, i'm still wondering how she was licensed.
I'm so mean, but that's the ugly fact. Don't ruin us students if you can't teach. You'd be cursed even if i refrain. Argh speak about being kind!!

Luckily, i rock my humans. Your history geek here :D
I'm worried though, there is always just SO much to memorize and I think i'll pass out absorbing the whole book nearing Os.
Stressing.. I'm going to be a hot mess next year.
All in all, I haven't been pleased with my results for the past 3 years and I have little faith I will be next year.
I don't know what's wrong with me, this is so not becoming.

But somewhere desolute, I've got this feeling that I wouldn't be a total wreck in my Os... I don't know if i can trust this feeling though.
I must admit I hate being average not lest to say last, I like to win. I like to triumph!! I hope I have this thriving in my blood when I set to mug for Os. Just do it!
Cause I hate to regret.. hate to say shit i should have done this done that, i'm realistic what's done is done so stfu and move on.
I really loathe people who start whining crap.. i should have studied haiz and begin ranting emo
Seriously, fuck you.. if you knew at the time you had to study and obviously did not, then stop bullshitting as if anything's going to change. Probably feeling lousy blaming yourself, well, you should. But then again, too bad you're screwed and done.. get over it.
That's how I treat myself actually :) And I'm delighted I do, cause I don't wallow into depression and I always get back on my feet fast.

Now I feel scared whenever I think about studies -math. I've lost touch with it for over a month.. and i probably forgotten all that's once been instilled in my brain.. oh well, Math has never been a friend of mine.
Let me just get done with this topic, it's starting to bug me.. im feeling awful already.
I pray to God to be merciful and make me love school next year, love math.
... I feel it already, I love math.. im gonna ace it!!
God is kind. Amen.

Currently active in, Dancing :)
Life is about networking, tons of connections gets you tons of advantages (;
So yes SPD charity show with the girls was really fun, although the choreo was really ... but meeting Elvin and Nat Ho is plain awesome, hunkies!! But duh I would exchange them for Taylor Launter, HAHA i get the craze about his body and all after catching new moon.

And then the people in D'elements are really fun loving, so it's cool.
I know, D'elements sounds kinda off... i dont like it either okay?? I'm trying to start liking it, really.
Through dancing, I realised I am a really picky fussy person.
I hate dancing to whatever I don't like, if the song's a turnoff. screw. i'd be damned the whole class. my mind would be wandering and I wouldn't focus.. i'll start cursing for the lesson the end.
everyone else is like so engrossed and im like a fool.. im annoyed with this part of me but tee hee, that's just so me.
But but I'm in love with Mazlan's classes. And himself. (:
He is suchaaa hot adorable sexy mama. He's bloody cute and hilarious.. ahh.

oh well.. guess I better wrap off here.. It'll take forever to finish whatever's on my mind.
There's just so much I don't know where to stop.
I'm in a huge dilemma now, i'm wondering if I should get myself into this or not.. since next year would be a really busy year.
And, main focus is still studies.
Things just always happen at the wrong time. HOW.

oh yes, i wanted to mention it sucks to not be able to apologize for something you've done.
and I have been having thoughts about having a company in future.. lol!
oh well oh well, the world is vast... i'll find my place somewhere.
And hopefully find the right guy, well someday!

oh and im penniless now!! one day of shopping with claudia and chernie can rip me off. oh i just listened to my blog songs! feel so happy strangely!

Time for a good night's rest,
adios!

In Christmas-sy mood! (8
I'm going christmas shopping tmr!! whoo.
This is one holiday which I've not done much shopping, dying to shop now.
My brother is shopping with his friends at China now, all the things like dirt cheap!!!!!!!

I just realised it's 3 more weeks to school.. yet again, I have not finished holiday hw!
Sucks. sometimes school is pretty f-ed up, we're teenagers and we should have the freedom to enjoy life without worrying about undone work at the back of our head.
yup and i decide im not going to do anything for this two weeks cause im going to enjoy my christmas!! and companion of loved ones :) :)

I actually have quite some things to blog about but I don't have the mood to do so now..
It's usually at the moment when something amusing happens that you'd wanna share but then when it's over i dont feel a urgent need to blog cause it doesnt feel exciting to me anymoree..
hell yeah i fail as a blogger C:

Oh. Kay.
I totally have no inspiration to bog now!!!!!!
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
let's see.. i hate orchard road decorations, it's nice but when the red light lights up it looks like lanterns and totally exudes the mood of CNY.
yuck. dont get me wrong, i love chi new years but Christmas decorations shouldnt look like them!!!
wrong colour choices totally!

Yesterday -Went to see my aunty's apartment at Raffles Quay.
And went to eat at stupid 313's foodcourt which the bloody duck noodles costed $5.80!!!!!!!!!!!
worst thing is it SUCKED!! coffee shops 3dollars duck noodles taste so much better!
fuckxzxz i'd rather go eat at a restaurant!!!!

Then had to go down to mediacorp again, seriously eats up a lot of time!!!
and the hair dresser cocked up my hair yesterday and the make up artiste spammed like 10inches worth of foundation on my face, yuck!!!!!

Tomorrow better be a good day with good finds!
who doesnt love christmas shopping?!
wheet.

Going to find things to do now, and start cursing school next year.
Teachers are allllllllllllll gonna start breathing down my neck!
Strangely, my parents don't bug me so much on my studies.. i don't think that's a good thing, like nobody forcing me to study for tests blablahblah. now that reminds me, i havent even got my report book!! LOL
teacher forgot to give me.. and my mom was lazy to meet my teacher!!..
So apathetic! haiz and im going to miss jy next year >: ((((

Enough about the depressing talk,
time to bask in the christmas mood!
Think about more meaningful things, do more heartwarming things!
Be kinder in words and actions and thoughts! (8
Now i'm telling you why,
cause Santa Claus is coming to town!!

Ps/ RAIN IS TOTALLY THE SEX.
damnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

I didn't think they were really hot on tv but i swear they are hot in real life!!!
Elvin or is it Alvin?? yeah he's really friendly and handsome!
my face looks damn crappish, boo

Nat ho :) your water polo guy.. and the pic's kinda blur... zz!

----

Okay. anyway last friday i was kinda bored at night so I watched chn8 at nine, and i saw this guy which i thought was pretty handsome.. (i got to know his name the next day -Dai yang tian.)
I saw him in the make up room at mediacorp.. and my friend told me his name.

Out of courtesy he asked if i wanted thiss. obviously take it!!!! hahaha

I hate myself for not asking a picture with him.
He's so goodlooking! Sat in the room staring at him whole time please.
ok la.. camwhoring included when he wasnt there of course.

and more next time.

SPD charity show 8D

alot of other pics upload some other time...
so boring. today did chi project. Ate shaker fries! yumm.

okay.. im off.. bye.[:

hi sup lovelys
this is some overdue picture.. and me looking horrific... [:
i remember i was damn tired and i was having some bad hair day, bad dress day etc etc...
hell i was dying of hunger too.. and my friend snapped this pic of me getting engrossed with my holy noodles..
Ok. That's besides the point, i just wanted to post a picture to make my blog less boring. LOL

cock up face ahh.

hmm and this is an old pic of my ex-bling nails. cant see it from here but just make do.
i think i was trying to act cute doing that SHH look but i failed. HA.
but i like my eyes and hair here. so yeah...{:

I painted my nails today.. cherry pink with white polka dots at the side..
love it for now, but my dots look out of shape hahahha.

i know where my randomness came about now -genes.
really. My dad told me he wants to dye my hair last night.
Yellow. random much? -.-

im feeling very boliao today...
cause i stayed at home and played couch potato.
woke up like super late 1plus... ate, watch tv, eat, watch tv, eat, watch tv, do nails, eat, watch tv, use comp.
didnt touch any hw :(
sometimes i wanna get done and over with stupid school and hw life, but think about it, i dont wanna grow up and start missing sec sch life too. so might as well enjoy every phase of life......

Tomorrow is dancing day. we're doing dance rehearsal for the SPD Charity show this sun tmr
think it's going to be an easy dance, or why else would we only need 2 days?
And it's last a super late rehearsal for something on tv?
then got normal crew training, and yes tmr going for Mazlan's :D :D :D

I wanna eat yummy food... feeling hungry at 1242am now.
ok got nothing to blog about..
need to bling up my life.
CHRISTMAS SHOPPING !!!!!!!!!!! talking abt xmas gets me excited.. gotta love the season(;

I want an Iphone for christmas! :((((
and no more tom dick or harrys
okaaa bye

oh i forgot to mention my hair looks exceptionally nice bouncy and volumed today! so sad didnt go out!

this song gets me HIGHHHH!!

---

had sushi with kexin last night after doing show.
didnt eat sushi for quite some time!
den went over to this super nice place i never knew!!
damn pretty the lights the food and everything??? too bad only stayed for awhile:(

ok gonna go. ciao

dear we're always here.
you got to prove to yourself firstly, and then to the rest of the world.

i love my cousins and my aunties uncles and grandma ^^
All of them are so fun loving!!!
had steam boat today and played mahjong after like many many months...
and i won! ^.^ Muahahhaha
damn fun.. playing with my aunty and nainai is hilarious.. they slip hokkien vulgarities in super funny manner like my dad-.-

ok so today waking up early was a task cause i was on the phone with ubin till like 2am 3..
talked about random things.. and sec1 days that seems so far away.
haha we're gonna be sec4 in one months time omg
dont know whether to wish for time to fly or what man...

lucky me.. ive got the best family ever ^^
adressing aunties as aunties sound old when they're not.. my aunties are Young at heart and very In ok.
hhahhaha. they bought chocolates for me and famous amos!!
and my shopaholic yiyi came with a gigantic bag full of clothes for me.
going to run through them laters, wheet. all branded stuff i cant afford!!

yipee we're going to have chalet sometime before xmas.. and then christmas party like every year:)
and maybe after that go and find lover quekkkk hoho.
so sad cherine cant accompany you to comtemp tmr :P miss me :D

ahh im so going to dance next thurs.. Sexy danceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!! Mazlan's!!
MUST GO!! regretted not going yesterday! he danced to TIK TOK!! my new addict song!

ok some randomness now..
ive got so much hw left :'(... why does this holiday feels so short!!? must be cos of the dumbass nov programme..

i have alot of things to do.. :( like finishing up ALL my assignments.
i need to revise god damnit.
dont wanna screw my Os.. :( ..........

im so not the old me now.. hahaha in terms of mentality and all..
wonder if thats a good thing..
but thats how life is hur? growing up and maturing.. better off than numbskulls who never try to change their perception of things.. loserly sad.

oh kay ive been a very friendly girl these days :)
i always am la?????  ^.0
oh oh im going to have a baby cousin (girl!!) next feb. cousin or something i think..
another baby to play with.. heh ^^

pffts..... ive got chem bio and physic ten year series book to finish.
life is sad.
o well... thou shall not dwell on it for now.

im thinking of doing hair treatment and cutting my hair soon {:{: ..
hmm cant remember what else is there to say..
goodbye for now <:

Why should I be sad?
Heaven knows.
From the stupid freaking things that you do.

----

llala hi all.
i think blogging is really boring. -yawns
but ive nothing better to do now.. just finished 1 eng assignment.. happy [:[:

went out with my dad and cousin and cousin's friends in the afternoon to Ikea.
Quite sick of the food there already, it's not even cheap to begin with..
then erica called me then later she came with dione to Ikea.. hahah and alot of drama things happened.
came over to my place and i realised i didnt bring my key which was really stupid....

was at Ikea yesterday too.. literally had to stop my dad from buying all the cookies and chocs.
he bought like damn a lot???? and i know tjy is expecting me to bring it for her tmr.. HAHA which i shall see if i remember.
wanted to go find my baby cousin again...... but no time. :(((

anyway sat was damn retardedddddddddddddddddddd :'(
my brother laugh like mad when i came home.
ahhhhhhh

finally went to dance on fri.. danced poker face. Super funny..!
before that went to eat like mad with rina cherine and claudia.
from plaza to vivo to pomo non stop.. crazy i tell you.

hoping to start on my hol assignments soon.. :)
next year will be a beezy year!! alot of events for the first few months.. then got to work hard for Os...
boohoo my life is so boring.....
christmas is comingggggggggggggggggggggg!! presents!!!
i love xmas shopping and receiving presents.. like who doesnt?!!!
so fun and heartwarming!

who wanna go jogging with me at night?
furbie is a fat dog. cant run with me.

Byeeee.
what
an
asshole.

Random pictures..

--

What you see is what you get
This is me, hey you
If you want me, don't forget
You should take me as I am
'Cause I can promise you
Baby, what you see is what you get

You should bever try to change me
I can be nobody else
And I like the way I am

You should never try to change me
I can be nobody else
Believe me, you'll be looking for trouble if you hurt me
I can promise you, you'll be looking for trouble

--

I've never been untrue to myself..
me is just so alicia.

I embarrass myself.
I cry I laugh I play.
I get angry.
Im vain.
I like to gamble and poker.
I like to sing and dance.
I screw myself up sometimes.
I just wanna have fun.

i hate people who ill treats old people?
i love little babies?
speaking of, i played with my cousins yesterday [:
and 5 year old julian is ridiculouslyyy adorableeeeee

im a total bitch sometimes?
i love britney, and im so influenced by her music?
I like to dance when im feeling it.
I hate it when people are bloody effed up

i so dont know what im talking here?
i dont know what i wanna do in the future?
i hope i can do well for my Os??

there's like 3 sides of me?
im a bit schizophrenic?
i wanna go ktv soon?
i dont like dancing whats not my style?
i cant dance for nuts?

I wanna hang out and i wanna study
i did my nails and toe nails
i have school this whole week again??????

im simple. really simple. believe me when i say it
but im complicated too...
you dont know me until you really know me??
im weird. yeahhhhh.

End of post that doesnt make sense :)
go wtf!!!!!!